April Fools

It’s been three years since I graduated from college, yet I still don’t know what I really want to do. I seriously envy the people who’ve already set their minds to what they want in life. I’m still looking for that in mine, and they’re already starting to settle down.

I’ll be resigning from my job as a Marketing professional this April 1. I’ll be focusing my time on growing FILED, which truly does have a lot of potential for expansion. Oz and I also have a lot of business ideas in mind that could become something great–so now’s the time to put them into action.

Awfully brave of me to take this step without any certainty. Oddly enough, despite being the thinker that I am, I make big decisions based on gut feel. This makes it scarier, of course.

Wala naman mawawala sa iyo. That’s what I tell myself. I know that if I don’t do something I’ll always keep on wondering, and there will be never-ending what ifs. I’m just promising myself that I need to have something stable by the time the year ends, or else.

– – –

Why this scares the sh*t out of me:

1. Financial instability – This is for the future thinker me.

2. Disapproval of parents – I try to tell them as less as possible because when I do tell them anything, it gets shot down. Of course, they’re just worried about me.

3. Uncertainty – I do not like not being able to plan, and being uncertain about things in general. I’d like to have at least something to hold on to.

Why this is exciting:

1. FREEDOM. Haha, seriously.

2. I won’t have to keep up with the annoying-ness of a certain person in the office.

3. I’ll be able to handle FILED full-time. No more sleeping at 2am and feeling a little guilty about doing FILED work during office hours. I’ll also be able to look for and visit suppliers at my time.

4. Execution of new business ideas!

5. I’ll hopefully be able to think more clearly about everything and know what I really want.

– – –

3 days left. Here goes!

 

My Valentine’s Weekend

A Weekend of Everything That Flies!

Ever since I heard about it from a friend 5 years ago, I’ve been itching to go to the Hot Air Balloon Fiesta in Clark. This year, I finally got to go with Oz!

Since we both know that he won’t wake up for the 5:30am balloon flight, we decided to overnight instead on Saturday night to be able to make it to Sunday’s flight.

Where we stayed: Clark Lohas Hotel

A Korean hotel with excellent service, although we expected more from the room and there was still a lot of construction ongoing. With no traffic, it’s just 5 minutes away from the Airfield.

Around the Hotel

Where we went: Duty Free Shopping Center

After checking in at the hotel, we decided to visit Clark’s Duty Free area, which turned out to be quite depressing. We didn’t take pictures anymore, but everything looked run down, both on the outside and inside. And at the front of Puregold, these little angels greeted us:

Doggies!

I got even more depressed with how the lady selling them were just grabbing and throwing them around. 😦 If only I could, I would’ve bought each and every one of them. Some were sold at 1000php, others at 2000php.

Where we ate: Cafe Mesa

We finally got hungry at 3:00pm and decided to hunt for a restaurant, which proved to be a little challenging. There were no restaurants around! Fortunately, we stumbled upon this little haven near Fort Stotsenburg.

We had the grilled prawns which was served with either soup or fruit. The food was great, and I’d suggest for you to eat there if you’re going to Clark (also due to the lack of other options haha). I’d definitely go back, both for the food and the ambiance.

The Main Event!

We arrived at the Airfield a little after 5:00am on Sunday, which was just about time since other people were also just starting to arrive. It was still pitchblack (and freezing) outside when Oz noticed a man flying around in a parachute way above us, being controlled by a motor. Crazy. Haha. Then the 4x4s started arriving, bringing the baskets/balloons to the field.

(Other Pictures in my FB Account)

After their flight, there were some air shows which were amazing as the planes were flying so close. The sky was also filled with too many kites, i think. Haha. We walked around to look at the concessionaires–I wanted a mini hot air balloon SO BADLY but the line was too long and it wasn’t really that worth it 😦

* * *
It was a breathtaking scene, the balloons rising with the sun. There really is a certain peace and calmness you feel as you watch the hot air balloons slowly drift away into the horizon. No one really knows where they’re headed but they float with ease and without any care in the world. 🙂

I will definitely go back next year and ride one. I’ll also get that cute mini hot air balloon, I promise.

Taking it from The Rescues

It’s hard to wake up each morning dreading not looking forward to the day ahead.

The walls are caving in with no warning
This ship is sinking, I gotta swim for it
I’m running out of air

Break me out tonight
I wanna see the sun rising anywhere but here
Come with me
Oh, this could be the only chance we get
We gotta take it
We don’t do it now we’ll never make it
Lose this crowd
Oh break me out

BUT, ALAS.

Commitment and responsibility. Sometimes, you have to stick with something even though you’re not as happy as you once were. Stay for the rightfully wrong reasons. Stay for respect, stay for the relationships, stay for the small ounce of love you have. I’m letting myself be dragged everywhere to nowhere, yet anchored in what I believe will be what I want. I just hope everything works out.

2010 was a year full of change, in one aspect.
2011 will also be a year full of change, in another.

Dr. M.H. Uy, thank you for carrying the big burden of being the only thing I look forward to everyday.

Hello 2011!

Spent the new year with my family, watching people jumping and flying around in the National China Acrobatic Circus. I now have secret fantasies of joining the circus and being flung around like I weigh a pound. Haha.

It feels weird to welcome the new year now, it really does seem so soon. 2010 went by so fast that I barely noticed it ending. I should start setting my goals for this year before time gets ahead of me again.

Hoping not just for an awesome year, but an awesome decade ahead. 🙂

Endless Probabilities

I have a hard time believing that people can change, or that one action does not define a person. You always tell me not to judge someone based on an act alone. But I argue that having done something once means it’s just as easy to do it again. And if you don’t judge a person by his actions, on what should you judge him with? Is it really possible not to judge someone at all?

It is on this premise that my fear of the unknown is built. People can just as easily do something, or do something again for that matter. We are capable of so much, and that thought keeps me going the whole day. Living in the probable future, not minding whether the probability is high or low.

This is my problem. I talk of probabilities, when I should talk of possibilities.

Hello there

Being with you is an overwhelming experience of a world of paradox.

I look at you and a part of me is scared. We’ve talked and talked, about anything, everything, at all, anymore. But feelings are uncontrollable, and mine are irrepressible.

I’m scared of your touch because each time you hold my hand or kiss me, you draw my heart closer to yours. I’m scared of our conversations, because each time we talk about something silly or serious, I get ecstatic for the future.

I’m scared, because just as easily those things happen, you can break me into pieces. It’s inevitable, and I’m not ready yet.

But I’m here, I’m yours. In spite of.

Thank you, and Happy Holidays!

Some of the gifts I got this Christmas:

Best Christmas gift for 2010? Perseus (my iTouch!) of course. Although it’s also the earliest Christmas(/birthday) gift I received this year because of the excitement of the giver. Haha. Oh, and also the purple folding bike I won in the raffle of our company Christmas party. Will post pics of that soon. 😀

Less than 12 hours ’til the 25th and I still can’t believe the yuletide season is here. Gah, time is moving too fast.

Good Morning

I have always believed in the importance of starting your day right.

It’s 9 am on a Monday and:

1. I have an intense headache coupled with neck and back pains.
2. I was 6 minutes late to the office because of my brother.
3. I am uninspired and unmotivated to work, and really not looking forward to the week ahead.
4. I am emotionally down and my eyes are still a bit swollen from last night.

Happy thoughts, please come as soon as you can.

Scared /,= Excited

I’m scared of change. Change in the things I’m used to, or change in something (someone) I’ve grown to like or love.

I’m scared of uncertainty. Yes I’m scared of fish, but I’m more scared of the vastness of the ocean and what lurks beneath. Endless possibilities scare me.

I like my own little bubble, where I’m comfortable and happy. Don’t bother me with change, don’t bother me with uncertainty.

But where’s the fun in that?,  you say.
Fun is relative, I say.

Most of the time though, it isn’t an option between being scared or being excited about one thing. Most of the time, scared is excited.

Spot the Difference

Downward, Upward.

The pessimist, the optimist.

With something as simple as the natural curvature of the lips, how noticeable their differences are. Yet, how well they mesh together.